![]() |
Welcome to my Enigma
![]() ![]() ![]() October 2001
![]() October 10th. My visit with my regular doctor. I brought him up to date
![]() on what has been going on with me.
![]() Blood was drawn and I should have the results in two days.
![]() My moods have been erratic. Sometimes depressed, sometimes high.
![]() I have been trying to keep them in check but they are hard to control.
![]() My feelings, thoughts and words.
![]() My mind races with wild ideas.
![]() I started smoking again. Since I have been off my medication.
![]() I know, not a good habit, but it seems to help.
![]() October 12th
![]() I got the results. After of month of being off medication the level raised again.
![]() None of this makes sence.
![]() I have scheduled another doctors appointment for the 19th.
![]() I will keep you posted.
![]() UPDATE
![]() Well, I went to the Doctor on 10/19/2001.
![]() He decided to wait another two weeks, 11/8/2001 to have another
![]() blood test taken. He said that if its still elevated or higher then he
![]() will refer me to a specialist.
![]() MORE waiting.
![]() In the mean time I am still rapid cycling.
![]() I came home one day this week and I had this overwhelming feeling that
![]() my boyfriend was hiding something from me.
![]() When he came home from work the feeling got worse.
![]() I did not talk to him that night about it. I was too emotional.
![]() The next time we talked. He said he isnt hiding anything from me and that he
![]() loves me very much.
![]() I really hate being Bipolar.
![]() October 22, 2001
![]() Well I am rapid cycling. I have been this whole weekend.
![]() Actually, I am really angry right now and everything seems to be setting
![]() me off. Why??? I DONT KNOW!!!!!!
![]() I really hate this.
![]() I can also feel my self, my body shaking.
![]() Panic attack??? High level of adrenaline?
![]() Everything irratates me right now.
![]() Yesterday I had a telemarketer call the house and that made me mad.
![]() About thirty minutes later another one from the SAME company
![]() called me and I told him off...using a few choice words.
![]() Then I sat out side and I could feel it coursing through my body.
![]() I really hate this...I really hate having to "let it ride out"
![]() In the meantime I make my boyfriend & daughter miserable.
![]() Is there ever an end to this?
![]() | home About Me | Bipolar | The High Time | The Downward Spiral | January-February 2001 | March-April 2001 | May-June 2001 | July 2001 | August 2001 | September 2001 | October 2001 | November 2001 | The Psychiatrist | Second Psychiatrist Visit | The Therapist | Second Therapist Visit | Music | Links and E-mail
![]() |
![]() |